A Balanced Life, LLC

A Road Map for Your Life

Like any other trip, we need a road map as we navigate through the journey of our life. Before the time of GPS or phone apps, I would often contact AAA and have them send me a TripTik before a road trip. They would ask me what was my ultimate destination. In addition, they would also ask me if there were any cities or points of interests that I wanted to see while on my trip. AAA did a great job of plotting out my road trip. They would send me maps of the states I would be traveling through and my designated route would be highlighted. All I had to do was get in the car and follow their directions.

We recently entered into a new year. Now is the time to stop and map out where we want to go and what we want to accomplish this year. Now is also the time to stop and plan how we are going to get our desired results. Having a resolution or an idea of what we want to accomplish is not good enough. We owe it to ourselves to stop and really plan how we are going to accomplish out goals and our dreams. This is what living intentionally is all about.

Self Improvement Month

The month of September signifies many different things to me.  I immediately think that September is a chance to sneak in a last minute summer get away during the Labor Day weekend.  It also marks that time when kids go back to school.  This means that the warm lazy days of summer are over and they will soon be traded in for the fun fall leaves that will shortly be falling from the trees.  September is really special to me because I share September as my birthday month with many of my close friends.  So in my mind, September is a month of transition physically and mentally.

I was pleased to discover that September is Self Improvement Month. This is the perfect time of year to recognize what areas in our lives in which we can make improvements. There are many different things about each of us that use some improvement. Some of the areas we may look to improve can be :

• How well do we think we are balancing the various roles in our lives
• Health
• Relationships with family and friends
• Finances
• Giving our personal, spiritual and professional goals some clarity

Including September, there are 4 more months left in the year.  This is the perfect time to pause, be a little selfish and do some "me" work.  It is critical that we don't loose our sense of self or loose focus of our goals because we are busy with helping others be their best and achieve their own goals.  Remember, it is never too late to rebuild any part of our lives.

Glued in Place

Have there ever been periods in your life when you have felt that you are just plain stuck?  You may feel   as if you can't get your motor going and it's easier just to let life happen.  In your mind you may think about the many things that you know you could or should be doing.  But you just don't have the energy to invoke change.  During these times you may even feel as if one day just flows into the next with any effort on your part. Yu may also feel  like your just going through the motions. 

When I have experienced these feelings I would feel like I was stuck in one place; almost like I was glued in place.  Even though I had these feelings it was important that I couldn't allow myself to surrender to being glued in place.  I had to remember that I had the choice and the power to become unstuck.

Each of us is endowed with personal power. There are certain circumstances and situations that we can control. It comes down to 2 choices. We have the power to choose to take control of our life or we can continue to allow our lives to take control of us.  I will admit there are times when I have felt that it was much easier to go with the flow and accept whatever life happened to bring my way.  I would allow myself to just be glued in place and I would react to my circumstances. The danger with this strategy is that staying glued in placed and in reactionary mode did not allow me to be empowered to design my life. 

Why Women Settle

Why Women Settle, and Give Up On Their Dreams And What Can Be Done to Reverse It

    By Allison Maslan, HHP, CCH

When women come to see me for life and career coaching or homeopathy, I often find myself saying, “ You really do deserve to be happy.” With this statement I often receive a perplexed expression as their reply. Such a simple and somewhat obvious statement, but surprisingly for many women, it rings distant from their reality.

Their confused stare translates to, “Really? But how can this be? How could that actually happen? True happiness seems so far from my life that I honestly have no idea how to get there.”

I don’t mean that all women are walking around miserable. Far from that. However, deserving to be happy can have many connotations. It can mean the opportunity to have all they desire in life, to reach their dreams or to be completely fulfilled and content right where they are.

Many women tell me they remember having dreams and longings at some point in their lives, but over time, have lost touch with these aspirations. At this junction, these desires seem more like fantasies. Many women have expressed to me that they feel so trapped within their circumstances that happiness has meant settling, or making the best of what they really do not want.

Why is this so? And how did this happen? Is it a message we have unconsciously inherited from our mothers that says, “This is the best you’ll get or the best you can do, so deal with it”? Is it ideology from Cinderella and Superwoman gone astray? Or has it been the many disappointments in love, a dead-end quest for a dream career or never making it past surviving on a month-to-month income while juggling the responsibilities of home, work and family? Or maybe one has a great job, but it leaves no time for anything but the job? And the push for all of this has left many women feeling overwhelmed, lost and just plain tired.

New Years Intentions

Wow, a New Year and a New Decade!!! What an exciting time.  Yesterday, I spent time going back through my calendar. I used this time to help me reflect and think about 2009.  There were aspects of 2009 that brought joy, sorrow, frustration, happiness, etc. 

After reflecting on the past year I became excited with the possibilities of 2010.  I am ready to let go of 2009 and start to think about my plan for 2010.  A little light bulb went off in my head when I read a post by Ariane de Bonvoisin.  Instead of making resolutions, this year I am going to live INTENTIONALLY.

Intentions are goals and objectives.  I am determined to live each day, week, month, quarter and the entire year intentionally.  My actions, attitude, conversations, and the people I surround myself with will propel me toward achieving my 2010 objectives.  Each new day is a new opportunity for me to move toward my goals.  It doesn't matter if these action steps are big or small.  What matters is that I am making progress.

Being in tune with myself will help shape my intentions. This means I will be able to recognize if my intentions need to be shifted.  Constant evaluation is critical to living intentionally.  Intentions are quite different from traditional resolutions.  Typically with resolutions, we make a list of those things we want to accomplish or change.  The problem with this is our lives are ever changing and are fluid.  Because of this, it is good to recognize when we need to change directions. In fact, recognizing a need for change and invoking change is courageous. It's living intentionally!

Take the next couple of days and the upcoming weeks to truly define what your intentions are for 2010.  You don't  have to accept what life brings you. Within you lies the power to live INTENTIONALLY!

What Makes Your Heart Smile?

The amazing thing about life is that we have choices.  We can choose to do nothing and except what life dumps in our laps.  We can choose behaviors that have negative consequences. We can choose to invoke changes that will have a positive impact on our lives. Within us lies the power and ability to design a life that is full of integrity.

There is something that we should remember to consider when we are deciding on what changes to implement.  If we are trying to align our lives with our personal definition of integrity we should consider things that make our heart smile.  Our hearts should smile about all aspects of our lives. Our hearts should smile about:

• Our family
• The career we have chosen
• The friends and the company we keep
• Our finances
• How we spend our leisure time
• And the list goes on and on

There are so many people who have careers, relationships and materialistic things that detract from their lives.  However, our lives should be filled with things that add joy and make our heart smile.  I encourage each of you to really examine any areas that don't make our hearts smile.  Be honest with yourself and formulate a plan for change.  Your deserve a to have a life of integrity and one that makes your heart smile.

Calendar Congestion

There are many time management experts that teach us the importance of scheduling ourselves and keeping some sort of calendar system.  Personally I agree that scheduling our appointments and daily tasks is a great idea.  Writing down our daily commitments is a great mechanism for making sure we keep track of everything we have to do.

I also believe that writing things down on our calendar allows us to examine if we are being unrealistic with our time.  Looking at our daily, monthly and yearly calendars can let us see if our calendars are congested.  Congested calendars are those calendars that have obligations and tasks penciled in from the time someone gets up until the time they go to bed.  A great visual clue is to look for white space on your calendar.  If we don't have any then chances are our calendar is congested.

There are several strategies that can be used to prevent or alleviate calendar congestion.  Some tips to consider when cleaning up are calendars are:

• Evaluate each and every appointment and commitment. Are our obligations in alignment with what is really important or is it filled with commitments that we feel pressured to accept?
• Do the commitments on our calendar reflect obligations from all aspects of our lives? Or are our obligations lopsided?
• Are we being unrealistic with the amount of time we are allotting for certain tasks or obligations?
• Are there areas where we can simplify and slow down?

Looking at our schedule on paper can be a visual reminder for us to decide if our calendar is congested or not.  Maintaining a congestion free calendar is a great tool for living a balanced life.

Shining The Mirror On The Inside

The month of June brings a lot of buzz.  The kids are getting out of school, summer is beginning and it's time to start the family vacations.  All of these things are exciting and fun.  Yet, June can also be the time of year that we do a self evaluation.

Typically, January is the time of year that people make "resolutions." This is great, but it shouldn't stop there.  Once we come up with our plan for success we have to evaluate it's effectiveness and make modifications if necessary.  Since June is Rebuild Your Life Month and it's it in the middle of the calendar year, it's a perfect time to Shine the Mirror on the Inside.

To get this process going, I looked at the following areas:

• What strategies are working to help me feel balanced?

• What areas do I feel need to be strengthened?

• Have I made any progress toward my goals?

• Do I need to change any of my goals?

Spending some time in self reflection has allowed me to come up with a road-map for the rest of my year. I was excited when I took this time to Shine the Mirror on the Inside.  I was really amazed that I didn't find this task daunting. In the past my life was extremely unbalanced.  Participating in this type of analysis would have felt overwhelming.  This is because I wouldn't have any idea of where to begin. But not any more, I am living my life purposefully and it feel great!

A Life With a Fresh Start

Since June is Rebuild Your Life Month, it's a perfect time to think about starting your life with a fresh start. It's never too late to make changes. Two of the hardest aspects to overcome when deciding to make changes in life are:

• Unknown. Changing means that we have to step out of our comfort zone.  There is a certain level of familarity that comes with our identified weaknesses.
• Money. The lack of resources can often prevent one from making changes in their life.

Carefree has announced their Fresh Start Contest.  The first prize is a check for $10,000 to assist someone with making changes in their lives.  You can find more detailed information and contest rules on the official Fresh Start website.  There's no better time than the present to start working towards a Fresh Start.